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Everyone who tries to create love with an emotionally unaware partner suffers. Self-help books galore tell us that we cannot change anyone but ourselves. Of course they never answer the question of what will motivate males in a patriarchal culture who have been taught that to love emasculates them to change, to choose love, when the choice means that they must stand against patriarchy, against the tyranny of the familiar. We cannot change men but we can encourage, implore, and affirm their will to change. We can respect the truth of their inner being, a truth that they may be unable to speak: that they long to connect, to love, to be loved.

bell hooks, The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love (2004)

Women have believed that we could save the men in our lives by giving them love, that this love would serve as the cure for all the wounds inflicted by toxic assaults on their emotional systems, by the emotional heart attacks they undergo every day. Women can share in this healing process. We can guide, instruct, observe, share information and skills, but we cannot do for boys and men what they must do for themselves. Our love helps, but it alone does not save boys or men. Ultimately boys and men save themselves when they learn the art of loving.

bell hooks, The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love (2004)

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"Oh Peter, it’s just as I’ve how always dreamed it would be!"

Peter Pan (1953)

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Annie Clark creates these lavish, over-ripe arrangements partly so she can hide knives inside them.

Apt description of St. Vincent’s music from a 2011 Pitchfork article (via ifuckinglovestvincent)

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Rep Your Culture  | NYFW

holy shit !!

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*does drugs but won’t eat white bread*


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